when the stars go blue

After reading Steve's post earlier I started thinking about one particular part that turned a light bulb on for me. He said something good about himself and then said that it wasn't of him, it was of God. This got me thinking about my issue with pride, and thinking I'm "better" than other people. I shouldn't think that way, I should be grateful that God has shown things to me that other people haven't seen yet or that maybe they're not ready for. And that doesn't make me any better- I'm the exact same person as anyone else, I just am blessed enough to have God in me. If there's anything in me that I think is better than the next person, maybe it is but it's NOT me, it's God. This really helps me because when I think about growing in the Lord and that He wants us to become better people and I've always thought, "man, if God wants me to grow closer to Him, and I do it and other people don't doesn't that make me better than them?" I mean, in our human minds that's the truth, but the Truth is not the same as ours. I think the closer I grow to God and the more He reveals to me about how He wants us as humans to live with one another, the more He will humble me at the same time.

So when is it that we realize in our walk that there will always be something for us to improve on, but still want to be doing that on a consistent basis? I can't wait to get to the point where it's exciting, not frustrating, to find something about myself I can improve for God. I don't know where I'm going to be 10 years from other than married and following God and I'm slowly becoming exhilarated about the freedom I have right now in deciding what I want to do with the rest of my life. I'm only 21, I don't have to have all the answers now. I'm so happy that I'm so in love with my baby and Jesus. What more do I need, really? I sincerely pray that the Lord helps me with my bad habit of complaining when He's blessed me with so much. I want to be one of those grateful Christians that a person can look up to just so they can know God better. I want people to see God in me through my actions and through the way I react to life and what it throws me.

Okay, bedtime.